I understand that life goes farther than
and wider than we will it to go. Sometimes we tug at the cloak of time to slow it down. It swishes on gently as if not bothered by our pleas and screams. I haven’t written in five months or so and as soon as I saw the blank page, my heart poured out into words I haven’t planned beforehand so please forgive me if my words are jumpy or clumped.
I have been on a journey so far.
A journey with my Father.
I recently found myself hungrier for him than I have ever been and I mean ravaging hunger, my bowels churning for a blooming relationship with him. I found out something so deep and special that every time I think about it it it brings about the glowing spectrum of a revival of love and understanding of who my father is.
My father is in love.
I cannot fathom such an amazing, glorious deity that sits on his throne thinking about me (& you) all day, every second. I have been in relationships before, but not as magnetic and everlasting as this. He is thinking of me right now and my heart shivers at the thought.
I sometimes stare at my reflection in the mirror and gaze at a mixture of dirt, imperfections, mistakes, sin and impurity but a friend (a sister rather) told me that Father doesn’t look at my imperfections, he only sees His righteousness in Christ.
Two exes ago, I was searching for a female to satisfy my urges and feelings. I found one at pecked at her mind like a woodpecker (no pun intended) slowly digging into her mind and emotions with my sweet words. My finger pressed on buttons that sent lies to her. I deceived her and when I was done with her I threw her away for another female.
There is a lesson in this flashback, when you don’t have God all you have is the world. The world will appear to please you at first, you will ravage for it and hunger for it and it will throw you a dry bone still covered in meaty fungi and after you have licked the bone and picked at every marrow. You will gaze at the world, your newfound master and it will laugh; laugh at you like a white man would laugh at the slaves as they fight for the leftover bread he threw down the front porch. Then it would throw you another bone and another till fade.
The world doesn’t satisfy eternally.
Its temporary satisfaction will only lead to permanent & eternal regret.
I’m never one to simmer down the pure gospel for anyone.
I will not make the gospel sound sweet just so you can bite it and then months into it you will leave it because the world threw you a sweeter bone.
I will not stand up to you and tell you that life as a Christian would be all smiles and smiles.
I will not hide the nights with you on your knees in sweat and tears fighting for your faith.
Holding on to the rope which is Christ and pleading your case boldly before the throne of grace.
I will not hide the devil’s constant nonstop arrows flying towards you in the form of obstructions, lack, oppression and whatsoever he wills.
I will not hide the pain of lost friends because of what you believe in (Jesus).
But I also will not hide the glory behind it all.
I would not hide the joy from revelation and heavenly visitations.
I would not hide the joy from victories won in Christ Jesus.
I would not hide the devils plan guaranteed to be always thwarted if you hold on to your faith.
I would not hide the daily testimonies on testimonies on testimonies.
I would not hide the beauty of assurance of a glorious future.
I would not hide the Rock where you can share all your troubles and they transform into stories that will win others into this glorious path of unending joy.
I love you so much that I will not lie to you.
You were made for this.
God bless you.
This post was written by an amazing brother (in Christ) of mine. An artist in a deep relationship with Our Father. Feel free to follow him on twitter or Instagram, @JoshWesey.