My darling blog that I have neglected forever and ever. I’m so glad to be back here.
I think it’s only right that I start with an explanation as to why I stopped (well, paused) blogging.
I stopped because I was distracted. I stopped because I became lazy and complacent with my walk with God. I stopped because I had nothing to give. And trust me, you can’t give what you don’t have. I’ll share some of the things I’ve learnt in this time.
Admitting that I am struggling is something I struggle with. I like everyone to think that I have it all together. I like to tell myself I have it all together, even when I don’t. I realize, however, that this only comes from a place of pride. I do not have it all together. If I did, I wouldn’t need God. It is in my weakness that He is glorified.
No wonder Paul says he takes pleasure in his weaknesses. Because weaknesses are avenues for God to show up and show out.
I am absolutely nothing without God. Without God, I am purposeless. I am empty. I am like chaff, blown around by the wind. I am a hot mess. There’s too many gaps within me that only God can fill.
Without God, I get distracted. I look to other things, people, activities to fill the gap that only God can. And this is a dangerous place to be in, because you’ll keep trying harder and harder to fill God-sized gaps with the wrong puzzle pieces. The end result is an empty, frustrated, what’s-the-point feeling because nothing you try is ever going to fit. God alone can truly satisfy the longings of my (and your) soul.
I can’t give what I don’t have. Scripture says
“Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks.” (Luke 6:45)
Another one says
“Out of your belly shall flow rivers of living waters.” (John 7:38)
It is what abounds in your heart that will come out of your mouth. Keyword – abounds.
The water in your belly must be so full, that it starts to flow out. Keyword(s) – so full.
Basically, I cannot manifest God until I am so full of Him that it is forced to come out. And what happens when I am constantly giving out and not spending enough time in the secret place to refill? I run dry. My fuel gauge is on empty. I have nothing else left to write about.
There’s nothing more important than your secret place with God. Your prayer closet. Or whatever else it is called in this our Christianese. It is in this place of intimacy with God that you are empowered to truly live for Him.
One more thing I have learnt is… I cannot run from God. He doesn’t let me. In a way that only God can, He draws me back to Him. Always. This is a constant.
What can separate me from the love of God? Nothing.
God just always arranges it somehow. He sends me signs, He sends me people, He speaks directly to my heart. I am convinced that this God I serve will never let me go. And He will never let you go.
It is my prayer that we never lose our wonder. It is my prayer that our eyes are stayed always on Jesus. It is my prayer that we experience a new level of intimacy with Him. It is my prayer that God graces us to be more intentional in our walk with Him. I feel an urgency in the Spirit, and I pray that God aligns our life with His will for us. Amen.
If you’re in any way struggling with your relationship with God, and you want someone to pray with, to join their faith with yours, or just to talk to, please reach out to me. I’m available.❤️